Dying For The Cause
by tinypicklerick
Summary: "I wouldn't mind dying, if living only meant being alive." The capture of a moment just before the Battle of Hogwarts. TW: mention of character death


**A/N: This is a one-shot based on the popular fan theory that the DA turned into an actual army during DH.**

An air of frantic foreboding hung over the castle as its occupants prepared for what later would be known as the Battle of Hogwarts. Most everyone was silent, preparing mentally for what they knew what was coming. Families and friends were taking the time to say all they needed to say, tears flowing and embraces shared. Not everyone would be surviving the night. In fact, it was possible that _no one_ would. Neville was in the middle of it all.

He angrily searched the face in front of him for any sign of change, hoping she would not be doing as she had declared she would. He, alongside everyone else, had respected her from their respective first year on for her fair treatment and loyalty to her house. Never had he expected to be on the other side of an issue than the woman in front of him to this extent.

"We can't send them away! Without them we'll be outnumbered four to one instead of three to one!" It was obvious that McGonagall's patience was running thin as her nostrils flared. "As I have told you over and over again tonight, Mr. Longbottom, it is my and my colleagues' job to take care of the children in this castle. We may not be able to tell the legal adults what to do, but we are fully within our rights to tell the minors to leave this castle as we are doing right now!"

His efforts over the next few minutes to convince her were futile. Angry tears were prickling in his eyes as he realized that the woman in front of him wasn't going to change her opinion. Not on this. So many of the sixth and fifth years who had been training _just_ as hard as he had, as Seamus had, as the other seventh years had, wouldn't be able to fight for the cause.

Taking a step back he shook his head as if trying to get rid of the desperation that had come over him. Even though he had pledged his life to the DA just like everyone else had, it was only now becoming apparent to him how big the chance was that he would not be seeing the light of tomorrow. He looked back at the group behind him that had silently been supporting him in this argument. Most faces showed the same anger that he felt, the same despair and the same hopelessness. One face, however, stood out.

Colin was smiling. It wasn't a full-blown smile as he was wont to wear so often, it was a soft, understanding smile. He stepped forward and nodded at McGonagall, who seemed vaguely taken aback. "I get it, of course. You have not been able to protect us the last year, making us fend for ourselves. So you want to do that now, you want us out of the castle so these _Death Eaters_ ," the way he spat those words contrasted heavily with his understanding expression, "won't be able to hurt us again. You feel as if you've neglected your duty all year and want to compensate now."

Everyone could see the confirmation in the woman's face. She did not say anything, however, waiting for the point that Colin was clearly trying to make.

"However, what you're planning on doing isn't _protecting_ us at all!" He outright laughed at the confusion of everyone's confusion around him. "Look at me! I'm a _Mudblood_!" Neville tried to interrupt him angrily but he had already continued. "Me and my brother might have been able to forge records to make us look like half-bloods but it doesn't make it any less true! Now, I don't want to offend you ma'am, but today is clearly the final stand. If we lose, we _lose_. You might be protecting us this one night, but you're putting our entire futures at risk!"

McGonagall didn't seem impressed. "You won't have a future if you're not alive." She barked out, finally getting irritated with the children in front of them and the attention that they had gathered as the entire Great Hall was watching the exchange.

Kingsley Shacklebolt, whom Neville had met once during the aftermath of the fight in the Department of Ministries, seemed to want to intervene. "Minerva is right, children. Time is running out. All of you under 17, please follow Mr. Filch out of Hogwarts."

The group around him seemed resigned, the younger ones already turning away to follow the aforementioned man and Neville shared a look of hopelessness with Ernie. He half-expected Colin to immediately reply to McGonagall but he had turned away as well, a hand around his little brother's shoulder. The reply only came when he was almost out the door.

"I wouldn't mind dying, if living only meant being alive."

With that closing statement he turned around again and walked away.

That was the last Neville would ever see of him alive. He wouldn't, and he didn't think that anyone who was there would, ever forget the scream of pure terror and pain when McGonagall found out the identity of the body that had been found outside, mangled by all sorts of curses but still carrying a tiny understanding smile.


End file.
